"Fear" of Falling

I was thinking the other day about when we became much more cautious and a little fearful of taking a fall.  I know that 15 years ago, if I tripped and fell, I didn't first think "Oh, God, please don't let anything be broken!"  My first thought then was "Oh, God, please don't let anyone have seen my ungraceful crash!!" 

Was the seed of fear planted when my maternal grandmother fell and broke her hip, eventually resulting in her giving up and willing herself to die?  Is it seeing many friends and family needing hip replacements?  Is it born from occasional visits to care facilities where older folks who are unable to get around are housed?  Does it come from the creeping sense that balance has become less stable?

It's probably all of these things.  For me, it became a real live fear when Wayne and I began riding bikes last year.  We got on those two wheeled vehicles that, when we were young, were wonderful speeding, wind-in-the-hair miracles.  Then if we fell, and we all did, it was a non-event...maybe a scraped knee or a bruised elbow. 

We first returned to riding bikes when visiting friends in Door County who are avid bicyclists.  I couldn't believe how unfamiliar getting on one was and how wobbly my first rounds of the bike rental shop's parking lot were.  I have to say, something akin to genuine panic set in as we peddled off to a woodland bike trail.  After falling off a couple of times, I realized that I was falling off, because, when I prepared to stop, I put my foot down too soon...before the wheels had stopped rolling!!!  How could I forget how to stop and get off?

We did find that we liked the sport, trepidations be damned, and bought bikes to ride at home.  We live in an area that is low traffic and perfect for the timorous rider (and timorous I am).  I've mastered getting off (after stopping completely), and Wayne has been very kind in not laughing at my awkwardness.  He did, though, say that I looked like a hamster on a wheel as I peddled in front of him trying to get up speed so that I could make it up a hill!!  I've not forgiven that comment yet.  We've graduated to riding on the great public bike trails that run North and South from Mequon and, last summer, built up to a number miles per ride.  AND bicycling is great for improving balance.  I've not fallen off again, though I am always alert for the "chance."

I think I  alluded to making sure that bathtubs and showers are as slip proof as we can make them both at home and traveling.  It's irritating to think that we must do so, when inside ourselves we are still 25 year olds who couldn't possibly fall!!

We are careful on stairs trying to improve balance by lightly touching the bannisters rather than gripping them fearfully, but always mindful that some body part could "give" and having a backup plan is a really good idea. 

Any fall could be incredibly incapacitating as one of our good friends found when traveling in Great Britain.  She missed a small step going through a doorway to the lady's room and fell.  She did grab the door handle, but in doing so, pulled her shoulder out of its socket and tore many tendons.  This resulted in a hospital stay in a strange country (though English speaking) and many months of rehab when she returned to the U.S. trying to overcome serious nerve damage along with the other injuries.

All of this being said, we will still bicycle this spring and summer (if they ever come), we will still practice walking and moving with confidence, and will do activities that help us retain balance and strength. Taking proactive action to overcome fear, rather than giving in to it, are important to us to ward off the progressions of bodies that are not 25 any more! 

Now I have to face my fear of roller coasters and succeed in riding one with my eyes open!!  Good thing I have a brave companion who fears little!!!